Sometimes when we look into the mirror, we don’t like the person starring back at us. Sometimes we doubt if we are good enough for this world. We find ourselves having low self-esteems.
And we may blame it on the fact that we don’t look a certain way, that we don’t have a certain list of achievements, that we don’t have the friends that others have… But often, it happens that even if we do change our looks, even if we get those accomplishments and those friends that we think will make us worthy, we still feel that we’re not good enough. The low self-esteem still lingers even after we try to change ourselves.
There will always be someone with a longer list of achievements than you. There will always be something you don’t like about your looks or your friends. There will always be something stealing your self-esteem, if you base it on external factors.
You should know that changing yourself in order to improve your self-esteem might not always work. Unfortunately, many of us with low self-esteems have a belief buried deep inside our hearts that we are not good enough. And that belief won’t disappear even if we change our external circumstances.
Actually, looking for self-esteem in such changes can be like walking into a trap. Your appearance will change over time. Your ability to do things, to dance or play an instrument perhaps, may become irrelavant. Those friends that you think make you worthy can move out of your life. And if you believe these things are make you a worthy human being, what will happen when you lose them?
Maybe you should heal your soul instead.
Teach yourself to believe that you are worthy and complete just as you are. You are a special and valuable individual and you don’t need to change to become worthy. There are many people out there who will love and accept you for who you are. There are many who will find you beautiful and valuable with those looks, those strengths and abilities, those likes and dislikes that you currently have.
There is a lot you can offer the world by staying just as you are. Your uniqueness is what will enable you to make a positive contribution to the world and to live a meaningful life. If you change yourself to become like someone else, you might not be able to fit into your special spot in the world’s complex puzzle.
Once you realize this, you can have peace with yourself and your be comfortable in your own skin. And that’s the difference between those who look confident and those who don’t. Despite what they know or don’t know, what they look like or don’t look like, some people always have an air of confidence about them. These are the kind of people who know how valuable they are and they have peace with themselves.
Let your high self-esteem be the cause and not the result of your change. No, don’t change because you think the change will make you a worthy human being. Change because you believe you are already a worthy human being who can learn and adapt to anything. Let it be because you already believe you are worthy and valuable.
And as always, cheers to life!