Life is very complex; people are very complex. You cannot describe anyone’s character completely by looking at their behavior in one incident. You cannot look at your life today and come to a conclusion on how life is like in general.
But we still do that.
We have a tendency to let small events change how we look at people. You see a man spit on the road and you already decide that he is filthy and arrogant. You see a man help an elderly cross the road, and you decide he’s a saint. And you may be making decisions on whether or not to let people into your life after seeing how they behave in one or two incidents.
We paint life too with the brush of our circumstances. When life is going brilliantly and we have all we need, we decide, “Life’s Good! People are fools to complain.” And when life is tipping towards the terrible side we decide, “Life’s an unfair bully!”
But we often forget how changeable people are. We forget that life has an array of ever-changing faces. That man helping the elderly may just be trying to impress someone. And life looks like a bully only because you’re facing some difficult challenges. People have the potential to act in a thousand different ways depending on the situation. None of their acts should be the ultimate definition of who they are. And life has many different faces, none of which permanent.
When that saint of a man you married starts showing you un-saintly behavior, no, he’s not showing you his true colors. He’s just showing you his other colors. And you too should keep seeing yourself as one capable of acting in different ways depending on the situation, capable of succeeding or failing depending on the circumstances. People are changeable and so are you. When life throws a couple of problems your way, it’s not showing you the bully it really is, it’s just showing you one of its many faces. It can, and will change.
Life is complex, and so are people.
And as always, cheers to life!