Hang Out With People You Disagree With

Hang Out With People You Disagree With

As humans, we always seek familiarity, comfort and consistency. This makes sense because familiar things are more likely to be safer, and that’s why we evolved to like them. What we end up doing is surrounding ourselves with what we know, and people who present ideas that are not foreign to our minds, ideas we agree with. That’s why you might see Christians hanging out with Christians and agnostics hanging out with agnostics. But could it be that we have more to learn from people who disagree with us than people who agree with us?


When we meet people who don’t think the way we do, the general reaction is, “If they don’t agree with me, then there must be something wrong with them.” Why isn’t it the other way around though? If you disagree with them, maybe there’s something wrong with you. Why don’t we think about that? Maybe you’re the one having a mind too closed up. Maybe you’re not having a wide enough perspective. Maybe there are facts you’re not considering and that’s why you have your specific set of beliefs.


But often, we get so afraid of people that try to disrupt our world with their new ideas, that we avoid them completely. And like that, we miss the chance to open our minds, to learn new things, and to get wiser.


becoming wiser, hang out with people you disagree with



If there is a certain group of people that like somebody you despise, instead of immediately concluding that there’s just something wrong with them, or “they just don’t see how bad that person is,” maybe you should try to interact with these fans and find out the genuine reasons why they ride with the person. In the same way, if there are people that hate Beyonce, even though you think she’s next to God, then hang out with these people, find out why they could dare hate the Queen.


If you find people who are genuinely happy to live in a Congo village rather than New York, go hang out with them for a little bit and find out “what could possess them to love such a barbaric lifestyle.” In the same way, if you find people that love the city lifestyle while you can’t imagine life outside the peaceful rural landscapes, go spend a month or two in the city and find out what all the buzz is about.


Don’t be afraid to face new ideas with boldness. Seek out people who disagree with you and let them introduce you to a new world. Don’t be afraid that they will “corrupt” you or make you “just as bad as them.” Truth will always prevail. If what you believe is the real truth, and what they believe is wrong, then your truth will conquer. You will come out of the interactions believing your ideas even more strongly. If it’s not the truth, then you’ll have the opportunity to learn the truth. But that can’t happen if you close yourself up in a bubble of familiarity.


Start looking at people you disagree with as opportunities for learning, and not as enemies to be avoided.


As always,


Cheers to life!


quote on learning from people you disagree with






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16 thoughts on “Hang Out With People You Disagree With”

  • I found this to be a really interesting read. It is the same idea with the internet and news. We get our news from sources that generally share the same opinions as us or find things we are already interested in instead of expanding our horizons a little bit.

    • Yeah, the echo chambers. We get stuck in our own echo chambers and basically close all the doors to learning. And then we’re surprised when we meet a group of people who don’t hold the ideas that we have, while in fact, they were there the whole time, but we failed to see them. Thanks again for reading, Sierra!

  • What an interesting perspective. I’m the kind of person that hates confrontation so hanging out with people I disagree with would just make me miserable all the time. But I agree having a different point of view is sometimes important.

    • I don’t like confrontation either. But maybe there’s a way to disagree with people without having it lead to belligerent confrontation. Because we are missing out on a lot of learning opportunities by sticking only with the people who think like we do. Thanks again for reading, Ania!

  • Interesting read! Totally different concept and I love the idea to write an article about that issue! It’s very important to be open minded and hear what others have to say .

    • Yeah totally. Being comfortable with people who think differently from you requires a high level of open-mindedness. Thanks for reading!

  • This is such a great way of looking at things! We can definitely learn more from people with different views to our own.

  • Having different points of views, being open to learning and hearing new perspectives is great. I dont think I would hangout with people I disagree with though. I would prefer positivity over daily confrontation.

    • It doesn’t necessarily have to be a negative environment when you’re with people who don’t think like you do. If you’re mature and open-minded adults you can agree to disagree peacefully. Thanks for reading, Sheri!

  • There is always something quite interesting to learn about from different kind of people and somehow hang out with people we disagree with can bring both “bold or beautiful” result for us. Love the message of the post!

  • Sadly Nelu, you are speaking to the choir. The people who need to read this don’t join groups like ours. When they do and see the range of participants, they flee. Plus, others find such things confrontational so why bother.
    That said, I enjoy the company of open minded people. I have zero interest in hanging out with bigots and haters…. life is short!

    • I wish there was a way to say this to those who need to hear it. And I get it, it can be difficult to spend time with people who are rather bigotted. Sometimes, as hard as you try, you can’t make them see the truth.
      Thanks for reading, Beth!

  • This was a n interesting read ! I believe that more than hanging out with people “who do not agree with us” is just to be open to someone else’s perspective and maybe even a different culture. I have always been very open minded and I believe in trying new things and at least giving it a chance before saying I do not agree or like something. thanks for sharing!

    • Yeah, exactly. We deny ourselves the opportunity to learn by staying in our comfort zones. Thanks for reading!

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