It’s Important To You Not Them

It’s Important To You Not Them

What would you do if someone told you they reached the highest level in Mario Kart?

 

If you’re a gamer, you might be impressed, but if you’re not you’ll be like, “Umh.. okay. Who cares, again?”

 

Has it ever occurred to you that other people might also not care when you brag about your “impressive” achievements?

 

So maybe your cookies bring all the boys to the yard. Maybe you scored five goals in your last soccer match. Maybe you even got promoted to executive director at your job. Chances are, not everybody will be impressed when you tell them these things. They might just not care. To them, these might not be important achievements.

 

I’ve heard stories of millionaires complaining that their parents are still not proud of them because they’re not married or they don’t have kids yet. Β Does it mean that such parents are wrong to think that a good social life is the epitome of achievement? Owning a Ferrari might seem like a great achievement to you, but don’t expect it to be an important achievement to others.

 

On the other hand, you have women who manage to raise decent adults, send them to school, and get them to become successful CEOs. Still, there are people who don’t consider them successful because they’re housewives.

 

We often forget that just because someone thinks differently, or values something different from what we consider important, doesn’t mean they’re wrong. They’re just different. That’s it.

 

important to you not them, different priorities, athlete and business woman

 

A lot of disagreements happen simply because we don’t realize we have different priorities. Do you remember how upset you were when your mom said you couldn’t go to that party even though it meant the world to you? To her, your safety was more important that your social life. But to you, she was just the devil that ruined all your chances of ever ascending that high school social ladder.

 

If she had understood your priorities and you had taken the time to understand hers, it might have been a more amicable disagreement.

 

Do you want happiness in your social life? Then you might want to understand other people’s priorities instead of just assuming that your values are the same as theirs. Find out what your colleagues, friends and family members consider important and keep that in mind when you interact with them.

 

Don’t be surprised if they don’t respond with much enthusiasm to your achievements or if they don’t realize how important it is to you that everybody takes their shoes off before entering your house. And when they speak with enthusiasm about what you might not consider important, understand that these things are important to them and make an effort to respect that.

 

Better yet, understand your own priorities and hang out with people who have value what you value.

 

As always,

 

Cheers to life!



35 thoughts on “It’s Important To You Not Them”

  • That is a good point, we dont always need to get other’s approval in order for us to value what we have achieve. Because we have different perspective, what you value might not be as valuable to them. But for us that understand better, Lets Celebrate every achievement specially of our love ones and friends – not because we benefit or value what they achieve but because we value the PERSON. πŸ™‚

  • I’ve took so much from this post! I’ve got quite strong opinions and beliefs that we shouldn’t seek April but to find a balance and support each other through it all. Not everyone can agree, but everyone can support!

  • This is such a thought provoking post. I totally agree, what is important to others may not be important to us and as long as we respect other peoples opinions, we don’t all have to believe in the same things. It’s important to be your own person.

  • This is a truly insightful and inspiring blog post! it is easy to think that someone is being unfair or hard on you simply because they won’t let you get your way or because they aren’t proud of you! but you’re right taking time to consider others is essential to everyone – I think lives would be simpler and more fulfilling if we did this more often!

  • So true. It is perception that is the key . We all live different lives with different values and we should all be mature enough to embrace them all. Not that we must give accolades to everyone that crosses our paths with a story to tell. But, it would be good to give credit where credit is due. But that is it. Great post to remind us that we are all proud of our own achievements, regardless if anyone is.

  • That’s an important lesson, spend time with those who value you as a person and believe in the things you want to do. We just need to remember to be considerate of others.

  • I think if you are in the company of like minded people, then you’d get the encouragement and appreciation you crave for. So many times I have talked about my accomplishments but it seemed like only a few were interested. It felt like I was discussing about the glories and triumphs of a single hardworking mom to a bunch of women who are happily married and are pretty well off. Major disconnect.

    • True!! If you want people to understand you, you should hang out with like-minded people. Even though learning happens when you hang out with the opposites.

  • This post might sound indifferent but this is the reality, I think the post is well-written. I have experienced all people have different priorities; and it is so true that things you might want to brag and think it’s a great achievement – people don’t really care. Honest and sad truth is everyone after all only care about themselves. But that doesn’t mean we can’t be proud of what we have achieved.

    • Yeah. Exactly. Everyone is the centre of their own universe. We should understand that and understand that everyone will have different priorities. Thanks for reading, Claire!

  • This post is a wow, Nelu. Yeah that’s true. My family always the one who appreciates and value everything I do, hmm especially my mom. Who I always consider as my shining armour.

  • This is a really nice reminder. When I got an internship in a media-related company, my mother wasn’t as cheery or as proud as I’d expected her to be, but then I realized that we just have different opinions on that and on many other issues. This is how you come to terms with people, especially family whom you don’t really pick! πŸ™‚

    • Yeah it’s important to understand that you might have different priorities from the people you love. And to have a healthy relationship, you’ll have to find a way to reconcile your differences.

  • I’m so glad you included mom (and housewives) in your post. I don’t think there is a harder working (or more important) group of people in the world. Raising a child into a a decent, functioning member of society is truly an awesome feat. x

    • Yes it is! It bothers me that mothers are not appreciated just because they don’t have office jobs. I would say they work even harder than those with traditional jobs.

  • I pinned this article to my board called “Food for Thought” because it really made me reflect on things in my own life. It is important to consider different perspectives and I hadn’t thought about doing that when talking about achievements as well. Thank you for the post!

  • I always say – DO You! Sitting around waiting for others approval and validation is the road to massive pain.

    • It is! People just need to understand they won’t always have the validation they want. Thanks for reading, Beth!

  • This is a very honest post . I hardly speak about myself or my achievements to the people but when I get excited I am on and on which I am trying to control. It is so true that not all people appreciate you achievements that doesn’t mean you haven’t achieved anything. It’s just that we expect different things from life. I love the last line on surrounding yourself with people with similar priorities and expectations from life. I am glad I have such people in my life.

    • I’m glad you can relate to it, Surekha. And I think we should all remember that just because person X doesn’t show that much enthusiasm about our success doesn’t mean our success isn’t meaningful. Thank you for stopping by!

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